Writing My Overcomer Story?

It is no secret, or at least in this house, that I love Mandisa.  The strangest thing is I fell in love with her music before even discovering she had been on American Idol.  I know you may think that sounds strange, but I don’t watch much TV.  We do not even have cable – just Netflix and huluplus, which I do not watch that much.

Anyways, I was able to watch her new video for her song: Overcomer and was so touched by those that had struggled in that video.  It made me think of how what I am facing could be so much worse than it is.  Yes I wish I did not have weight issues because of PCOS, and I wish I did not have to deal with Infertility issues, but in the grand scheme of things I do have control over certain aspects of this journey.

Here is a pic to her new album 🙂 Someday it would be great to meet her in person.

I do not have to give in or give up.  I can choose to keep on fighting and I can choose to work my bootay off to get my weight under control.  Yeah it is going to be a lot of work, and I mean A LOT, but when I think of it there are people who have conquered bigger obstacles than that.  Her song had me thinking of when is it my turn to write my Overcomer story?  I mean the longer I wait to write it the less chance I have of having that opportunity.  There are so many health issues that can arise from having PCOS that if I do not do something now, I may not have a second chance to do so.

It is time to wake up and realize I am not alone in my trials – everyone has them.  After hearing the song and watching the video it has inspired me to write my story – and it starts today.  It is not about even sharing that story or being known for it – at this point I am writing that story for ME.  No one else.  However, I hope to share parts of my journey of course and in the process I surely hope it helps someone else with PCOS know they are not alone and that it is possible to fight – even if it feels impossible.  I have been up and down with my weight since 2003, and that is a long time – however I still have a chance to make a change and when you have that you should take it.  So that is what I am going to do 🙂

I love a lot of Mandisa’s songs and a lot of them have helped me overcome things and look at things differently and for that I am thankful.  This new song of hers had done just that, and I cannot wait to be an overcomer of my obstacles – of PCOS.

Cause if I am truthful with myself – and I am sure I am not the only one – I know I do not give it 100% all the time when it comes to weight loss.  It is hard, extremely hard – and that is putting it lightly.  It makes me feel discouraged and want to give up – and I do at times.  I think we like to fool ourselves into thinking we tried, but really we only partly try.  We give in or give up after we do not see the results we want in a week or two.  Or even a month or more sometimes.  Or there are other things that get in our way – such as my fear of going through another miscarriage, because every time I push myself and give 100% I end up getting pregnant, but then having a miscarriage 😦 So then I just want to not try because it is never fun going through that experience.  However, it is time to move forward and if I do not I am only harming myself and my dreams.

Jamming with My BFF

 

I’ve really never been one to use the term: BFF.  However, I felt it was the perfect title to this post….

I was on my way home from work and since it was so nice out I decided to roll down the windows.  With the wind blowing across my face and my tunes jamming “FREE” by Mandisa, and then “He Can Handle It” by Bebe and CeCe Winans.  Music loud enough to drown out my singing 😉 as I will not profess to be a great singer.

However, as I was singing and driving I felt like for a minute I was in the car with my friends back in HS, when you are driving and singing and just enjoying your girl time… well, that is how I felt however, I saw Jesus sitting in the passenger seat jamming along with me.

For a second I just smiled and laughed.  I’ve never had that happen before and was thinking how strange for that thought to pop into my head… but hey why not.  Why shouldn’t we think of Jesus as someone we can just talk too or hang out with.  I guess I find so often that we label Him as someone so serious.  Not to say He isn’t, but why not put Him in the group where He is someone, like a BFF, riding in the car and jamming to the tunes with you?

I for one liked the idea and it felt calming.  It was well worth happening even if I am the only one it has happened to… even if it comes across as corn ballish 🙂  Hey… Jesus is my B.F.F.